Le marathon de Nouillorc

Quoi? On s’est trumpés?

Un rappeur contemporain chantait sur New York « If I can make it here, I could make it anywhere. » Cela vaut aussi pour son marathon, qui n’est décidément pas comme les autres. Pas par sa distance (toujours 26.2 miles pour les fans de calcul voulant convertir les fameux 42,195), ni par sa taille (50000 participants, c’est le même nombre de courageux qu’à Paris), mais pour tout le reste, New York c’est une autre dimension que je recommande à tous ceux qui, comme moi, bornent to be alive.

3 heures d’attente avant le départ: l’American Dream

Courir New York est un challenge sportif, mais pas uniquement. Loin d’être un rookie de la distance (c’était mon 12ème), la logistique a encore blanchi un peu plus ma toison et perturbé un sommeil déjà bien jetlagué. La perspective de l’acheminement à Staaten Island, de l’attente dans le froid, de l’alimentation pré-course loin des pâtes traditionnelles du matin (on a tous nos petites habitudes, non?), du léger flou autour de l’organisation des vestiaires et autres entrées dans le SAS me stressaient: en effet, dans ma quête de précieuses secondes, le moindre oubli, la moindre boulette et c’était la fin de mes maigres espoirs de record. « Control freak? » Un peu j’avoue, mais aussi tête en l’air, alors… C’est équipé d’un balluchon aussi rempli que la hotte du Père Noël un 25 décembre et surtout de mon indispensable rétroplanning que je rencontre dans le métro un compatriote Bordelais avec qui je partage une visite touristique en ferry avec vue sur la skyline et la statue de la liberté encore endormies. À notre arrivée, le soleil se lève et mon stress s’estompe. Les conditions sont parfaites, à l’exception d’un vent de nord ouest qui va rendre compliquées les longues remontées des larges avenues de Brooklyn et de Manhattan. Entre rencontres et préparation (dégustation de Gatosport concocté dans un four old school de Chinatown, dépose des sacs aux vestiaires/camionnettes UPS et léger échauffement entre les files d’attente aux toilettes mobiles), je n’ai pas vu passer les trois heures qui m’ont séparé de l’hymne américain, du coup de feu et de Frank Sinatra. Sur la ligne de départ, dopé aux sucres lents, je passe une dernière fois en revue ma check-list digne d’un pilote d’A380: lacets check, gels check, GPS de la Garmin check,… Et c’est parti pour le show, un show à l’américaine.

Un jour j’irai à New-York avec Chauchau

chauchaupolo

Chaud chaud Arnaud

Avec le décor du Verrazano Bridge et sa vue imprenable, la chair de poule prend le pas (ou la foulée) sur les chauds rayons de soleil. Tout le monde m’a pourtant dit et répété de ne pas m’enflammer sur le premier semi… mais dès le mile 3 et les premiers spectateurs de Brooklyn, je mesure par moi-même l’ambiance magique de cette foule simplement venue célébrer les finishers de rien du tout que nous sommes.

Ces anonymes crient pour les « NYPD », les « Patrick » (que je n’ai pas attendus) et pour « Forrest » qui amuse et déchaîne l’enthousiasme new-yorkais. Je me sens pousser des ailes, presque malgré moi. Après 15K et de légers faux-plats assez roulanes (un D+ qui ferait sourire le plus novice des traileurs), je tente de « curb my enthousiasm » (Larry David si tu m’entends) au risque d’un massive positive split. Mais c’est sans compter mon retour sur un crâne chauve flanqué d’un drapeau tricolore, le crâne emblématique de Dominique Chauvelier, l’ancien champion de France du marathon. « Courir avec Chauchau à New York, c’est fou! » Bizarrement lui semble moins heureux de me rencontrer que l’inverse! Après quelques kms partagés, et peut-être lassé par mon quasi monologue, il s’arrête pour satisfaire une envie naturelle au pied du Pulaski Bridge. Le temps pour moi de me remettre, ou plutôt de me mettre dans la bonne allure, le Quinzaleur.

« J’en ai la chair de poule et frôle la gigite de Barthez en 98 »

Mais le plan ne se déroule pas sans accroc dans le Queens. Malgré un appétit plus grand qu’un barracuda, je ralentis et passe au semi en 1h24’50, grignotant mon capital secondes de la première heure.

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Smile après smile

Je réalise que le sub-2h50 ne sera pas pour aujourd’hui, mais ce n’est pas le plus important: le plaisir, voilà ce pourquoi je suis venu. Je tente alors de contrôler notamment sur la longue montée du Queensboro Bridge d’où j’admire la skyline de Manhattan qui me tend ses longs bras. Dans les derniers hectomètres du pont, j’entends déjà les clameurs de la 1st avenue. J’harangue cette foule qui ne m’a pas attendu. J’en ai la chair de poule (et frôle la gigite de Barthez en 98). Il ne me reste « plus que 10 miles » ; j’exagère, à ce moment-là, il me reste « encore 16kms ». Les touristes de Manhattan sont tout aussi nombreux et motivés que les locaux de Brooklyn. Je me nourris de ces moments, de ces sourires admiratifs, de ces mains tendues d’enfants Mes membres supérieurs se désarticulent sur les sonorités de Jay-Z, je suis prêt pour « Danse avec les runners », et me voilà rapidement au 30ème aux portes du Bronx, borough qui porte très mal son nom à la vue de l’engouement relatif comparé à ses voisins. Mais je gère mon effort dans l’attente de la dernière difficulté sur 20 blocs le long de Central Park. Et plutôt bien, car je reprends alors des runners suisses rencontrés dans le SAS et aux références chronométriques impressionnantes (en même temps, pour des suisses, c’est peu surprenant). Ça me regonfle encore davantage alors que le mur se fait attendre.

Je suis en mode machine.

Au 3*12eme kilo,  je reçois les derniers encouragements de ma supportrice numéro un, avant qu’un ami allemand me file un dernier ravito (en eau, la bière c’est pour plus tard). Je vole alors vers Central Park. L’occasion d’un énième bain de foule sur un terrain repéré 48 heures plus tôt. Il ne peut plus rien m’arriver ou presque. La hantise des crampes : je m’hydrate en abondance pour m’éviter cette mésaventure sur la 59th street au milieu des défections chevalines des carrioles pour touristes. J’y chauffe les foules et tente de capturer ces moments que je ne revivrai pas de sitôt. Un dernier virage sur Colombus Circle, et j’aborde en conquérant les 600 derniers mètres. J’oublie que j’ai aucune chance et je fonce de plus belle. Je franchis la ligne en 2h52’37, soit à 1’59 de mon meilleur chrono. Les volontaires dans la zone d’arrivée nous accueillent tels des héros, leurs yeux brillent et je savoure cette médaille presqu’autant que celle de Valencia lors de mon premier sub-3h. Je debriefe avec les helvètes sous le soleil de Central Park. Sur le chemin de Chinatown, les new-yorkais nous congratulent dans le métro, dans la rue, et je file à ma seconde récompense : un gros burger, des frites et une bonne pression.

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100% pur muscle

Aujourd’hui l’essentiel est ailleurs que sur le chrono affiché sur ma Garmin: le plaisir pris avec cette foule efface les 119 secondes manquantes.
En ce dimanche 6 novembre 2016, plus que jamais pour moi, l’essentiel n’est pas la destination mais le voyage.

Tips (gratos):

  1. Anticipez au maximum votre récupération de dossard où vous risquez de devoir choisir pour votre T-shirt commémoratif entre un pyjama et un juste au corps féminin. (Si vous m’apercevez boudiné dans un T-shirt bleu ciel à Paris, saluez-moi).
  2. Vous avez une tête à chapeau ou pas? Vous aimez les associations harmonieuses de couleurs comme le rose et le orange? Ne manquez pas les bonnets souvenirs Dunkin Donuts à Staaten Island.
  3. Méfiez vous des parcours venteux qui peuvent vous ramener toutes sortes de déjections des coureurs vous précédant… #truestory
  4. Enfin, et surtout, équipez-vous d’un T-shirt Douzaleur « Forrest m’a tout appris » ou « I’m a big running joke » qui vous assurera un soutien sans faille jusqu’à la Grosse Pomme.
144 commentaires
  • Plata Miguel

    Super résumé mais aussi un très bon temps !!! en costaud ….
    Bravo

  • Nanie

    Super récit

  • Joss

    Tips 5 : smile and enjoy! Well done Nono!

  • Marine

    Au top polo! Tu me donnes presque envie de reprendre le chemin du marathon

  • The coach

    Tu m’impressionnes toujours autant Forrest….mais où va tu t’arrêter ?

  • Pepe

    Bravo. Pas étonnant que tu voles sur le bitume avec une telle plume!

  • Mizu

    Merci pour ce récit ,qui m’a fait revivre mon NYCmarathon en 2009,qui était mon « first »!
    randiose!!! que j’ai couru a douzaleur »,comme quasi tous les marathons

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  • Franck LAVIGNE

    WELL DONE GUY! Bravo autant pour la performance sportive que pour la performance littéraire. Je l’ai vécu en te lisant. cela donne des idées….UN PEU FOLLES vu la performance actuelle.

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    • Au niveau de l'équilibre sur la trompe d'Eléphandret, le sculpteur a fait fort, mais comme Tilia, je reste mitigée. Je peux comprendre que cela plaise mais il faut comprendre aussi que cela puisse ne pas plaire. Je sais, je suis ringarde, mais j'assume.

    • Is that really all there is to it because that’d be flabbergasting.

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    • That’s not even 10 minutes well spent!

    • If you don't want to void the warranty of the phone you can also take it or send your phone to an apple retailer for $99 to fix it. Then you won't have the little issues that came from aftermarket replacements.:-)

    • That insight solves the problem. Thanks!

    • The honesty of your posting is there for all to see

    • Fuck Shit! Waarom was ik toen zo geobsedeerd door motorfietsen?Gemiste kans, da’s duidelijk…..Gelukkig wordt er nog genoeg moois gemaakt maar Atala, toch een legendarisch merk, dat dat nou afgezakt is naar hometrainers etc….Jammer maar helaas om maar even Wim T. te quoten.

    • Jenny,ahhh TV, sure wish I could say something real great right now, but the fact is, I enjoy TV just like the next guy! Have you seen the commercials for Hewlett-Packard? love em!

    • If the programmers fail to synchronize everything properly, there can be small random errors if network signals, clocks delay a little bit and these things can be really random.That can lead to situations, where two instructions dont take the preferred precedence, and lead to unwanted errors and procedures. (I met with server failures do to these things.) Of course, these should be, and can be ruled out.

    • Just the type of insight we need to fire up the debate.

    • Yup, that’ll do it. You have my appreciation.

    • That’s the thinking of a creative mind

    • Economies are in dire straits, but I can count on this!

    • I could read a book about this without finding such real-world approaches!

    • Mam takie pytanie, ponieważ przeczytałam nie tylko wpis powyższy, ale także wcześniejszy, zatytułowany "Eleganckie płaszcze męskie. Poradnik". Z tego, co można przeczytać w tym poradniku, wyciągnęłam wniosek, że płaszcz posła Napieralskiego jest to płaszcz myśliwski, a nie żadna dyplomatka – czy mógłby się Pan jakoś do tego ustosunkować? Z góry bardzo dziękuję za odpowiedź:)

    • 73- Glad to see Celtic fans actually back into basketball, it was really sad to see Kobe getting MVP chants at the Garden, only one season before “Celtic Pride” kicked in. Your team is phenomonal, but I don’t really care about them, and the Lakers hopefully don’t either. If we are lucky enough to have a rematch, I gladly look forward to it, with Byunm and Ariza in tow.

    • Thanks for sharing. Your post is a useful contribution.

    • That’s a subtle way of thinking about it.

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    • Was totally stuck until I read this, now back up and running.

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    • Tim, you can't buy much that is made in America, unless you want bombs and other war making stuff. Even American cars have little to do with 'Made in America'.Say, can you spare me a few bombs?

    • In the complicated world we live in, it’s good to find simple solutions.

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    • Evidenţă nu inteleg de ce ti se pare ca as fi dobi, dar atata timp cat vezi in casa ca 2 barbati “se trag pe oase”, copilul o sa creada ca asa e normal. Poate cand ajunge la maturitate o sa isi dea seama de sexualitatea lui si va alege. Homosexualitatea este o boala.

    • Free knowledge like this doesn’t just help, it promote democracy. Thank you.

    • This « free sharing » of information seems too good to be true. Like communism.

    • Hey there! I know this is kinda off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this website? I’m getting tired of WordPress because I’ve had issues with hackers and I’m looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be fantastic if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

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    • There is a critical shortage of informative articles like this.

    • That saves me. Thanks for being so sensible!

    • Maybe the campaign strategy of the Liberals is to keep all their policies secret, and unveil them only during the campaign, so that Harper cannot attack and neutralize them before an election is even called.It's probably just a vain hope, but we'll see.